Welcome to my blog. I'm afraid it won't be updated too frequently, as I only write when moved to write. These are a group of my poems, as written through the often difficult trek of the past nine months (at present) of my life.
I hope they speak to you and somehow reach the chords of your life, and that God will bring you through as He without doubt is doing to me.

God bless you.
~Jane Johnson,
August 14th, 2010

Monday, August 30, 2010

The Embers Flare

Looking in the mirror, to see the painted facade I've become.
What can I do now but live to redo what's already done?
Looking back on the shiny, scratched reflection of the past,
Do I regret what I've done, now only scars, not pleasures, last?

Giving my heart away so young, completely, irresponsibly,
Betraying my God, my faith, my stand and friends who looked up to me.
A song, a word, a look, a time, brings the pain flaring back.
I withdraw in silent misery to memories of which there's no lack.

A moment's flirtation, lighthearted teasing, a meaningful word or glance.
A month where darkness was glorious light, and life was a lovely dance.
Then pain and the knowledge of betrayal settled on my soul.
Now can the emptiness ever be filled, my heart ever be made whole?

I pray and pray and pray again, weep tears I struggle to shed.
Is there repentance deep within - why is my heart like lead?
I fight to put the past behind, the memories, sorrow and shame.
Betrayals still stare me in the face. I struggle to ignore the pain.

Living a life that is a sham, with masked up wars within.
Trying to put my burdens behind, without facing up to sin.
Was it a sin to fall in love? To feel this lasting sorrow?
I cover the darkness, turn and fight - ignoring the past for tomorrow.

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