Hiya!

Welcome to my blog. I'm afraid it won't be updated too frequently, as I only write when moved to write. These are a group of my poems, as written through the often difficult trek of the past nine months (at present) of my life.
I hope they speak to you and somehow reach the chords of your life, and that God will bring you through as He without doubt is doing to me.

God bless you.
~Jane Johnson,
August 14th, 2010

Friday, December 15, 2017

Start Again

I lie on the bed
Scanning idly on my phone
Listening to the noise outside.
So much to do
What can I do?
They're louder when I'm alone,
Those voices in my head.

I will achieve nothing.
This is my life.
I am lazy; I am selfish; I want attention.
This is what they say.
What can I say?
For all I know, they're right.
My life is as useless as they're saying.

I should get up, go out
Make my life something worth living.
Stop being a burden, start being a helpmeet.
They seep despair
And I despair.
What's the point in living?
There's nothing that I'm giving
To prove what life's about.

I grit my teeth, get up,
For I still have a life and breath.
I have to start again, when I know I'll mess up again.
God wants me to honour Him.
How is this honouring to Him?
My inner screaming makes me deaf;
Can't I just give up?

I'm a fighter - music tracks play once again,
But why does everything I touch in this life fail?
The privileges I have seen unfair to some
Because why do I feel this way when I have them?
What can I do?
Must make it through.
That's all there is to this tale.
Get up, fight on, win through this pain.
And start again.