I Wonder

One has to wonder
How much you can miss
Someone so much,
Then confronted with this -
A silent conundrum
Nobody can solve.
A gap without bridge
But friendship undissolved.

In silence we listen,
We wait, watch and talk.
And I sit there wistful,
Watching like a hawk.
So utterly different
As mortals can be.
What on earth made us friends?
Why stay you with me?

Pained joy to see
Your presence is here.
Pain you're so far,
And joy you're so near.
There's no way I can draw
Us close; it can't be.
Feeling sickened, I pray
We don't drift out at sea.

I know there's an Author
Who holds the pen
Of life in His Hand,
Who knows why and when.
I know there's a Pilot
Of ships in roaring waves -
I know I've a God
Who is mighty to save!

So teach me to trust
In obedience and fear,
But of Who Thou art,
And not of Thou near.
Make my understanding
Accept all Thy will.
Help me love Thee always
In good and in ill.